Idiot Who Calls Police and Says He’s “Too High” Found in Pile of Doritos

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The cops showed up at this idiot’s Austintown, Ohio home and found him on the floor, in the fetal position, surrounded by … Doritos, Goldfish, and Chips Ahoy cookies.

He said he couldn’t feel his hands.

Here’s the 911 call …


He can probably feel his hands now, or at least his wrists from the handcuffs, but he’s also got charges pending for possession of drugs and paraphernalia.

Oh well.

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