Last week Harry Reid announced his retirement. He said it didn’t have anything to do with falling off some exercise equipment in January.
As a side note, we believe Harry on that one.
Rumor has it that Harry had promised some unsavory characters who were related to the mob some favors in Washington.
He didn’t deliver and they got upset. In a heated conversation the former Senate Majority Leader spit out one of his typical barbed comments. One of the gentlemen took offense at Harry’s sharp tongue punched his lights out.
Back to Harry and whorehouse.
A “resort and spa” called Sherri’s Ranch located in the part of Nevada where prostitution is legal, has offered to host a retirement party for Sen. Reid.
The staff and courtesans of The Resort and Spa at Sheri’s Ranch (aka Sheri’s Ranch) would like to be among those who have officially congratulated you on your long and successful political career. We thank you for your many years of exemplary service, not only to our beloved State of Nevada, but also to the United States of America as a whole. We are sorry to hear that the Silver State’s most tenacious public servant will not seek reelection in 2016, and your plan to retire from politics.
Your work over the years has positively affected the lives of the legal prostitutes of Sheri’s Ranch. You were a strong force in pushing Obamacare and passing the Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act. This law now provides Nevada’s legal prostitutes (each of them an independent contractor who must acquire their own health insurance) the right to health care.
We want to do just a little bit of deconstruction on that last paragraph.ObamaCare had absolutely nothing to do with providing Nevada’s hookers a “right to health care.” The hookers who work Nevada’s streets and brothels have never been denied a right to healthcare. All they had to do was go to a doctor or hospital and pay for it. Alternatively their pimp or “spa” could have provided healthcare as a benefit. Obviously Sheri’s Resort and Spa made a business decision to not do that.
It’s very likely that the hookers couldn’t get health insurance because they work in a high risk occupation.
Obviously Harry Reid’s vote to pass ObamaCare took care of that problem for them. But it had nothing to do with the availability of healthcare.
The party invitation also notes that Reid is a vocal supporter of “gay rights” and since many of the hookers at Sheri’s Ranch are bisexual they appreciated his support.
Here’s how the party invitation wraps up.
For these reasons, and for many more not mentioned in this letter, The Resort and Spa at Sheri’s Ranch would be honored if you would consider our brothel the official venue for your 2016 retirement party. We have a beautiful 20 acre property with a hotel and restaurant on-site, and a full time chef, service, and security personnel.
As far as activities that we can offer attendees, many of your colleagues are intimately aware of our offerings, but we may have added new options since they last visited. In addition to our VIP sex bungalows, BDSM chamber, and numerous Jacuzzi rooms popular with our friends from the political arena, Sheri’s has recently added a new massage room where your guests can receive full-body nude massages from one (or more) of the two dozen legal prostitutes on the property at any given time.
We think a retirement party at a whorehouse is the perfect sendoff for Harry Reid. After all, he’s been a very expensive whore in the United States Senate his entire career. He should feel right at home.
He might even consider working there part-time to supplement his Senate retirement income.