Wow, what a week.
We’ve got floods of illegal immigrant children rushing the southern border looking for freedom, only to be stored in rat-infested warehouses.
Congress questioning the Bergdahl swap that released five terrorist chiefs for one little U.S. deserter.
Iraq crumbling before the eyes of Americans who fought to give that country a shot at democracy.
The IRS losing all those emails from Lois Lerner. (Whew!)
A U.S. veteran still being held prisoner in Mexico for taking a wrong turn.
Russian tanks rolling into the Ukraine.
Chelsea Clinton going in public in leather pants and pumps. …
But don’t worry. President Obama is on the job. He’ll be thinking very hard about all the issues facing this country (many of which he caused) as he gives a commencement speech in Anaheim, California (that’s Disneyland to the rest of the world), stuffs his face at another fancy fundraiser and finally makes a hands-on inspection of the links in Palm Springs.
The poor guy works so hard. He really needs to take a vacation.
Fortunately, relief is on the way for Mr. President.
A herd (flock? pack?) of biker types are roaring cross country on their way down to Mexico to get back our Marine veteran Andrew Tahmooressi, who is being held in Mexico after getting turned around in Tijuana and pulled over by los federales, who found guns that are legal in the U.S. in Tahmooreesi’s car.
President Obama can just lean back, put his feet up on the desk as he does and shelve those extensive rescue plans we all know he was making because, as we know from Bowe Bergdahl’s release, securing the freedom of an imprisoned Marine is a “sacred” duty.
What exactly the bikers will do when they find the prison where Tahmooreesi is being held is unclear. But don’t worry. If you can’t entrust U.S. diplomacy to a bunch of American bikers, who can you entrust it to?
Fortunately, Obama will also be getting some help on that Iraq issue, looks like.
He’s got to be sick of dealing with that country anyway, what with all that withdrawing of troops, materiel and other support he had to do.
And the fact that the Iraqi congress can’t even get together a quorum to give the Iraqi president emergency powers to fight al-Qaida has just got to be depressing.
The whole Iraq thing’s just got to be a whee bit embarrassing after Obama, as a senator in 2007, called the gains in Iraq a “complete failure” and the country went and remained reasonably peaceable and was making progress until Obama himself withdrew our support.
It’s almost like it’s not Bush’s fault.
Fortunately, Obama can now hand this one off to someone else, as Iranian officials have approached the U.S. about sending their advisers and weapons to Baghdad. This could be a good thing, since when Baghdad falls, possibly in the next week, then it could be Iran’s fault, and the Iranians are used to everyone hating them.
The illegal children in warehouses are being shipped across the border states and as far north as Massachusetts, so that’s done.
The Bergdahl swap has been dumped on Chuck Hagel’s shoulders. Check.
The IRS’s loss of emails pretty much takes care of itself, so scratch that off.
Russian tanks rolling into Ukraine … that’s tough. May be time for another “red line” speech.
That just leaves Chelsea. If only someone could be found who would tell her that plus-size, pregnant and Pleather don’t mix.
A president’s work is never done.