Cryos International is the world’s largest sperm bank. (I know, your father told you he is. That was just his male ego talking.)
Cryos prides itself on expertise in obtaining, preserving and then utilizing their primary product: human sperm. So, what has this global baby making firm in the news? Apparently they have bought in to prejudices against redheaded men, turning their kind away from Cryos depositories. What excuse does Cryos offer? Redheads, and the physical and psychological traits embodied by them, are undesirable.
Matt McCann, redheaded photographer with the New York Times expounded recently:
Cryos International, shuttered itself to red-haired donors in 2011. It cited a surfeit of “product” from redheads, at odds with its mission to offer a diversity of traits to its global clientele (although the company itself is in Denmark). Nevertheless, the move piqued the redhead community and its allies, who feared this is one step toward a ghastly future where eugenics would wipe the earth clean of its Prince Harrys, Julianne Moores and Geri Halliwells.
This prejudice includes the dogma that redheads are hot tempered, freckle-faced, ugly stepchildren whom parents are hesitant to claim. There may be some truth to the dogma, but that doesn’t change the fact that prejudice is wrong.
Besides, redheads are known to boost hair dye sales when one of them becomes famous. That alone should be reason enough to allow them to donate to the sperm banks of the world. Lobbyists from L’Oreal and Clairol could get behind this.
It is Cryos International’s discriminatory policy, and other forms of bullying that has redheads joining forces, demanding better treatment and declaring a national day of recognition. Among their expectations is an end to nasty epithets like ginger, carrot top and rusty.
Matt McCann continues:
The Cryos International news was troublesome to me, and I needed to know what Marina Rosso, genetic conservationist, saw in the future. Was it a post-apocalyptic wasteland of genetic modification, barren of freckles and green eyes?
“I don’t know. It’s complicated,” she said. She was more interested in provoking thought than providing answers. “I’m not a scientist,” she said, only a photographer.
So, here’s a scientific explanation, from an M.D. who wished to remain anonymous, for obvious reasons:
“The same thing in their DNA giving them red/orange hair, pasty skin and freckles also gives them unattractive facial features and unfortunate body composition and shape. It is just their DNA. When it comes to people looking for sperm donors, red heads are the least requested. Some even refuse redheaded donors for fear of having an ugly child.”
To all of Cryos International’s clients: If you want to ensure that your genetically modified offspring (GMO) do not emerge redheaded and homely, you need only point and click selections from the menu of features offered on their web site. When it comes to having a beautiful, mild-tempered child, it’s that easy. (This is good news for the increasing numbers of single women now choosing artificial insemination over marriage.)
When it comes to ending prejudice there’s a lot more involved than eliminating name calling and diversifying sperm donors. Just sayin’.