Noah, the movie, is out in theaters today and apparently it’s already sinking. I’m going to go see it this weekend and here’s why: I’ve read so many negative things about this movie that I’ve actually become skeptical that the movie could be so bad. How could someone spend a ton of money to make a movie telling an epic story with a great cast and it turn out to be a complete bomb? (No healthcare.gov jokes please.) There are probably people who will go see this movie simply because they’re just going to pick which movie to see while they’re standing in line at the ticket booth. There are some people who will go see this movie because this is the special effect flavor of the month. However, without the Bible believer demographic, there’s no way this movie can crawl off the floor of the box office. So why would Hollywood make a movie that alienates it’s targeted audience? Is it because they want steer others away from investing in movies that cater to Bible believers?
The name Noah has been among the top 10 names given to baby boys for each of the last 5 years, each year becoming more popular. I feel sorry for all those little kindergarteners named Noah if this movie sucks as bad as I’m being led to believe it does. It would probably be damaging to their self confidence for them to hear “Noah is terrible” everywhere they go for the next month or so. Did they really make a movie with the intention of destroying the esteem of a large number of little boys in the USA? Well, due to a lack of a better explanation, we’re going to keep that option on the whiteboard for now.
Right now the bottom line is that we don’t know if this movie’s any good or not. All we’ve heard from is critics who have previewed the movie and it’s not hard to imagine that a film critic might have an agenda of some sort. I, however, do not have an agenda other than to get my money’s worth when I go to see a movie. Of course I realize that poetic license is an artist’s right, but when a story I already know gets run over and the artist backs up and runs it over again, that license should be suspended. Now if they ever make a movie about my life and they get a handsome, muscular, charismatic actor to play me, then I’m cool with that. But if there’s a scene where I’m an astronaut on the moon, that’s just going a little too far.
I will be posting my thoughts about the movie here at www.joeforamerica.com after I see it. I will not be posting spoilers, but I’ll let you know if it was a complete waste of money or if I was entertained at all during those two and a half hours.