Congresswoman Eleanor Holmes-Norton to investigate what she actually does

18 124

In an effort to provide more transparency in government, Washington, DC Congresswoman Eleanor Holmes-Norton has launched a congressional investigation to determine exactly what it is she does for a living.

According to public records, she is a “non-voting” member of Congress. Most members of Congress skip votes due to a combination of detachment and disinterest. She has a 100% non-voting record.

The investigation will determine exactly what her lack of responsibilities are since she does even less than the rest of her overpaid and underworked coworkers.

The District of Columbia is thriving under a flood of government dollars doled out by Obama administration officials. Where the money ends up is undetermined since crime is every bit as awful as in poor cities such as Detroit. Congresswoman Holmes-Norton occasionally speaks about these and other issues, and is sometimes even permitted to speak on the House floor. Yet when the time comes to vote, she just disappears.

We already know what she does not do. However, what she actually does do remains a bigger mystery than why America even has a separate District of Columbia. Attempts to sell DC to Maryland or Virginia failed, and Holmes-Norton played no role in these failed transactions.

She did lead the effort to fight the sequester so that non-essential personnel would be retained. She made it clear that non-essential personnel were vital to America, and that she was proud to be non-essential personnel. The sequester was implemented, yet she stayed anyway.

To her credit, she has vowed to meet with every constituent in as many town halls as it takes until the mystery of what she does for a living is resolved. She remains upbeat, since many Americans from Puff Daddy to Vice President Joe Biden have succeeded without clearly defined job responsibilities.

Once it is determined what she does not do all day, she will then have a congressional committee study whether or not she likes not doing it, and whether she wants to continue not doing it. Outside of Chicago, it is very difficult to find six-figure no-show jobs. She could run for Mayor, but her refusal to smoke crack renders her unqualified. She said she is perfectly comfortable right where she is doing whatever it is people with her title are supposed to do.

As this story was going to press, she requested that the congressional investigation be closed. If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. When she was told that much of Washington is broken, she clarified her remarks to say that she had no idea how to fix it, and if she did, is not sure she would want to do that.

She then left for a meeting with her staff that nobody could define in terms of purpose.


Make sure to check our Eric Golub at

You might also like