It’s Unfair to be Tall

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I’m thrilled to finally see some mainstream press coverage for a long-overdue effort by the University of Wisconsin – Superior, which cuts through the superficial rhetoric regarding race and class in our society, and tells it like it is: Being white is unfair.

Over the past 50 years, guilty Americans have beat around the bush, nibbled around the edges and toyed with the idea that not being white has its disadvantages. Quotas, Affirmative-Action, racial set-asides, diversity training, multicultural programs and the Martin Luther-King holiday are all just diluted, politically-correct concepts which mask-over the real truth: It’s unfair to be white. Duh.

unfair2An honest crusade initially begun and quickly destroyed by the white power structure at the University of Minnesota (Viking heritage, anybody?) called the; “Unfair Campaign” is thankfully now being taught to students at the University of Wisconsin – Superior. It cuts to the core of what until now has been treated as a disease to be cured and confesses what no one wants to say out loud: Skin color matters in America, and if your skin doesn’t have color, you’re advantaged from birth. That’s right – white people are blessed.

The movement brilliantly promotes its cause with posters featuring white-skinned people who have messages written on their faces with a Sharpie, such as; “We’re lucky we’re white” and “Is white skin really fair skin?” I find it ironic and somewhat humorous that white people from the Midwest who freely appoint themselves as “Superior” would be the ones spearheading this effort – bringing light to racial injustice – but I’m impressed and delighted. They must have read about minorities and various skin colors somewhere in a humanities class.

One of the main slogans for the Unfair Campaign is: “It’s hard to see racism when you’re white.” And why would you – aren’t you set apart by your maker? Why would a human being even need notions of, ‘content’ or ‘character’ when you have the benefit of being white? And why has it taken so long for those chartered to teach America’s youth that our systems and institutions are set up for whites and as such, are unfair? Despite predictable complaints by white people, wanting to drag us back to the days where we spoke of a “color blind” society, the University Of Wisconsin-Superior has announced that the school intends to continue its support for the “Un-Fair” campaign. While I’m proud of them, let’s not forget that if they weren’t white, they wouldn’t even be in a position to do anything about anything, anyway – so there’s that.

Still though, this campaign looks to be expanded to other schools (Superior or not) and is only the beginning of raising unfairness awareness. Equally imperative at some point is how the issue of “tallness” will be addressed. Being white, of course, is the tallbest case scenario, but a quick look at any empirical data on human physique or attendance at a fashion show reveals what people of above average height know all too well: Being tall is unfair. It’s an undeniable truth, backed up by income inequality, class, mate-selection, fame and self-image. Stats show that people who are taller make more money, have nicer homes, more exciting lives, get hotter women, and in some cases, can dunk with relative ease. If your child is on the less-tall side, they are screwed from birth and it’s time America come to grips with this institutional bias. How about for starters, we begin spray-painting graffiti on tall people with messages such as; “Being tall makes you lower than me” and; “Don’t you wish you could go on all the rides at Disney World?”

You may think this solution will result in nothing more than giving people of average or lower height an inferiority complex and you’d be right. Teach your kids that they are not as inherently advantaged as the next kid because of something so superficial as DNA, and you’ll get an adult who believes it. Ridiculous? Yes. Destructive to the very people you claim you’re trying to help? Oh, yeah. Fact is there is racism in the world. While there are a few on one side who say Michael Jordan, Barack Obama and Tiger Woods are the evidence that it no longer exists and a few on the other side who say it’s worse now than it was in the 50’s, most of us of all colors wish there wasn’t any racism and do our best to improve the situation. The question is how best to combat it and make it a non-issue for the next generation. I don’t pretend to have the answers, but these race-baiters in Wisconsin and Minnesota are just a bunch of idiots.

How about getting a Sharpie and writing that on every liberal’s face?

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subject line: Short-ass white boy

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