Please disable your Ad Blocker to better interact with this website.

Chicago Cop Union Wants Pay Indexed to Murder Rate


Yup, higher murder rate, higher pay. I’m kidding about the title, but then it’s hard not to go there…

I see unions as always are totally “getting” that whole merit pay thing. The city faces a “looming pension crisis” according to The Godfather, Mayor Rahm Emanuel, and the murder rate has gone up 16% in the last year. So naturally, the Fraternal Order of Police thought now was a great time to ask for a raise for local cops.

When I say “ask for a raise”, I mean it in the union sense, naturally. Check it:

  • 12% raise over 2 years – about the national average these days, right?
  • pay less for health insurance – because ObamaCare has everyone else paying less.
  • increase uniform allowance to $2100 annually – For beat cops only? Nope.
  • reduce number of merit-based promotions from 20% to 10% – because….ok, why do unions hate merit-based promotions?
  • $3000 annual stipend for living in Chicago – perhaps they win this one with the ‘hazard pay’ argument.
  • reach top pay by 20 years instead of 25 years – meaning the raises come even faster.
  • retire squad cars and all other police vehicles after 90K miles – Really? When was the last time you heard of a non-union-built car that didn’t go at least 180K miles before it became maintenance-heavy? I think the answer was in the question.

Union president Michael Shields said the union demands requests were “realistic”.

Isn’t he cute?

About Author

The weapons had evolved, but our orders remained the same: Hunt them down and kill them off, one by one. A most successful campaign. Perhaps too successful. For those like me, a Death Dealer, this signaled the end of an era. Like the weapons of the previous century, we, too, would become obsolete. Pity, because I lived for it.


Join the conversation!

We have no tolerance for comments containing violence, racism, vulgarity, profanity, all caps, or discourteous behavior. Thank you for partnering with us to maintain a courteous and useful public environment where we can engage in reasonable discourse.

Send this to a friend