Hillary Clinton is no joke, unless she is…

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Hillary Clinton is no joke, unless she is…

Power-obsessed Hillary Clinton is consulting polls and focus groups to learn why she’s running for President.

With the gender card failing, Hillary Clinton is now demanding we vote for her since it’s been seven years since we had a man in White House.

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Hillary Clinton hired Rachel Dolezal and Rupaul to learn what race and gender she should be. She has vowed to be her real self upon learning what she is.

Hillary Clinton is terrified the FBI will find proof on her server of Bill Clinton‘s eHarmony and Ashley Madison profiles.

The real Hillary Clinton email scandal came when Huma Abedin found out Hillary and Anthony Weiner liked each other on Tinder.

Hillary Clinton is like Glenn Close in “Fatal Attraction.” She will not be ignored. However, In Hillaryworld, the bored bunny rabbit kills himself.

Hillary Clinton is bashing Wall Street bankers while privately wondering what they actually do. To be fair, she doesn’t know what she does either.

Hillary Clinton sent GOP 2016 presidential contenders her book. She plans to win in 2016 by boring her opponent to death. The GOP candidates vowed to use it to torture Islamist prisoners at Guantanamo Bay.

Hillary Clinton is uncomfortable that her server is backed up. Somebody needs to get her some prune juice and a bran muffin. She’s full of it.

At least Hillary Clinton is willing to compromise to get things done. She’s compromised her integrity, her competence, and America’s safety.

Confused LGBTQ protesters are angry at Hillary Clinton for opposing the Trans Pacific Partnership. We must demand AGE–Asian Gay Equality! Leftists called her a meanie and demanded Pacific Rim job Equality for LGBTQ Asia!

Asking why Hillary Clinton wants to be President is like asking why Palestinians riot. They don’t know. They feel like it. Just ‘cuz. Water is wet.

Hillary Clinton running for President because politics lets inferior people good at nothing be socially promoted. Some people think she should just get a job, but what can she do?

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A desperate Hillary Clinton is using old rap songs to court Millennials. “Down with TPP? Yeah, you know me!”

Several people died in the South Carolina storm. Hillary Clinton is sending in volunteers to make sure the deceased are reregistered Democrat.

Hillary Clinton to issue remarks on the South Carolina storm once her focus groups and pollsters tell her whether she is against it or for it.

Told of South Carolina deaths, a defensive and angry Hillary Clinton blamed a YouTube video and demanded the GOP smear machine cease talking about it.

Guns don’t kill people. President Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton’s indifference kills people.

The new Dan Rather movie is called “Truth.” The sequel will be a Hillary Clinton bio directed by Rosie O’Donnell called “Kindness.”

The best scene in the Dan Rather movie Truth comes when PLO Chairman Yassir Arafat sings John Lennon’s ‎”Give Peace A Chance.” The Helen Thomas goat-humping scene was deleted.

Forget checkers. Russian President Vladimir Putin is playing chess while Obama is playing pocket pool. This explains why Obama is blind to reality.

Is it sexist to say that Obama’s daily temper tantrums may be menstrual rage? Until we determine this Metrosexual Pajamaboy’s gender, hold off.

South Carolina rescue workers are desperately searching for gay black Muslim storm victims in an attempt to get the White House to care.

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